The crowd built up very early at Milverton for the final of the Bob Kerr Irish Senior Cup between Donemana, the favourites, and Leinster . The support was about 3:1 in favour of the Co. Tyrone club, and there were a fair few neutrals. Having consumed one of Eimear Kitteringham's world class scones (with jam and cream), I sat down to wait for the 12 noon start.

A kindly old man came over to talk to me. He said he was looking after the umpires, but I didn't quite catch his name – Paddy O'Lara, I think. I couldn't see that Mark Hawthorne and Noel McCarey needed looking after, but I suppose Cricket Ireland had to give some sort of sinecure to Brian Lara's great grandfather.

I saw him frequently during the match, walking round with a clipboard and a deaf aid. I had a drink with him and the umpires after the match in the bar, where he spent most of his time walking around rather distractedly with two glasses of wine in his hand. I guessed he was trying to find his guide dog, but I didn't want to upset him by telling him that labradors prefer arrowroot biscuits to cabernet sauvignon.

Leinster won the toss and batted. Steven Dunn opened the bowling from the pavilion end. Carlos Brathwaite didn't move his feet, swished nervously and missed. The ball clipped off stump. After the Donemana celebrations, JP O'Dwyer came in for his first match since injuring himself in May. He and Mark Jones played very carefully for the rest of the first six overs.

Then JP lifted Dunn high into the trees on the leg side and repeated the dose. Jonesey survived a chance to Dwayne McGerrigle at mid wicket on 5, and could have been caught by the same player on 17, but he kept a watching brief as JP went for his shots, some of them going not where intended, like the one that whizzed past James McBrine at slip.

He reached fifty in the 16th over and then slowed up as Jonesey played a few shots of his own. Having survived a chance on 59, JP was eventually caught by Dunn off Andy McBrine for 61 out of 93 in the 24th over. Drinks were taken at 100-2, and while Andy McBrine kept control from the Blackhills end (how can it be the School end when the school is over the other side of Joey Archer's field?), Jonesey and Anton Scholtz picked off the McBrine twins and Jordy McGonigle.

Jonesey eventually drove too soon at Andy McBrine, and was caught and bowled for 44 out of 141 in the 32nd over. Craig Mallon should have been stumped by the Doc on nought, but didn't last long before he was stumped off Jordy for 5. Ian O'Herlihy settled in as Scholtzy worked the ball around, mainly on the leg side, accumulating at a run a ball.

Scholtz, on 29, lobbed one up off his pad, but Junior running in from backward square, couldn't hang on to it. That's only the second time I've ever seen Junior drop a catch. Leinster had reached 174-4 off 40, and weren't discommoded by the briefest of rain breaks.

O'Herlihy then hit Junior for successive sixes into the trees and took a single. Scholtz followed up with 6, 4, 2. When was the last time Junior went for 25 in an over? First ball after a second rain break, Scholtz holed out at backward point off McGonigle for 75, and Will Lennon quickly went lbw to Shaffique.

O'Herlihy was eventually bowled by Junior for 37, Rob Kenealy displayed both his straight swish and his leg swish for 15 before being bowled by Azhar Shaffique, and Leinster closed on 265-8. The second rain break saved Donemana 30 runs, and Andy McBrine's 10 overs for 28 runs saved them another ten.

If Donemana batted very well, 265 was chaseable. 300+ would have required everything to go right and then some. They started carefully, and Graham Boyd had a life when Ian O'Herlihy dived to knock one out of Scholtz's hands at first slip. But Will Lennon got his reward for some penetrating bowling when Boyd holed out to Mark Jones at extra cover for 14 out of 25 in the 8th over.

A couple of overs later Richard Kee got underneath one from Lennon and top-edged it high to mid off, turned to march off but quickly doubled back when Hugh McDonnell spilled it. That was the break Donemana needed, and Keesey and Azhar Shaffique batted carefully, skilfully but never slowly to reach 110-1 at drinks, just after Kee reached his fifty.

Two overs later Azhar also passed fifty, and the score had reached 134-1 in the 30th over, bang on target. Then Shaffique nicked Scholtz through to O'Herlihy for 55, and Junior quickly followed, bowled by the Leinster skipper.

Kee had gone into his shell since drinks, scoring only ten in ten overs, before lofting Rob Miley to mid on where a relieved Hugh McDonnell took the catch to get rid of the opener for 61, 45 more than he should have got. McGerrigle biffed a quick 14 and was bowled by Miley. Then James McBrine, who had anchored proceedings, gave Jonesey his second catch and Miley his third wicket.

Dale Olphert quickly followed to give Miley his Guildford Four-for and Carlos Brathwaite a catch in the deep to cheer him up. Donemana never gave up the chase, and Richard Dougherty and Jordy McGonigle made nuisances of themselves. Their supporters, massed in front of Joey Archer's field, also began to make a nuisance of themselves, and Craig Mallon was hit by a (full) can of Tennants, not a favourite tipple in these parts.

The umpires stopped the match, order was restored, and Brathwaite returned from the pavilion end to bowl his quick stuff and sort out the Doc. The Doc, not wearing a helmet, was poleaxed by Brathwaite's first delivery. As he slowly came to his senses, some members of the crowd got messy again. Rob Miley must have thought he was back in Beirut .

After three drops in the deep, Jordy was superbly taken at long on by Will Lennon off Hugh McDonnell, the Doc eventually and predictably bowled by Brathwaite, and a cracking little knock by Andy McBrine ended for 13 as he was castled by the Bajan pro. Donemana were all out for 238, short by 27 runs. Miley took 4/46, Brathwaite 2/35 and Scholtz 2/38.

As is usual, the speeches went on far too long for the losers' liking, and could have lasted all night as far as the winners were concerned. Adi Birrell gave the Man-of-the-Match to Scholtzy, and nobody told him to f*** off back to Cape Town , where he was born, or Melbourne , where he was raised. Who wants to get rid of a super cricketer?

I went back to Rathmines for a couple or three, and things were just warming up when the missus, not best pleased, arrived at midnight to pour me home. I was very slow out of bed, and still driving down by the estuary when (I'm reliably informed) Yogesh smashed Matt Daykin's first ball through to Fintan McAllister.

But that can't have been true, because Yogesh was still batting with Darrell Calder when I appeared pitch side in the Village to see if Malahide could hockey Old Belvedere, gain promotion, and shut Del Boy up for the winter. He won't get very far there either, cheering as he does for the Scouse Gits, who will again be like Butlins, their season over in the New Year.

But no sooner than I had exchanged greetings than DC was bowled by Phil Markey, and one run later Reddy was similarly dismissed to make it 14-2. Sameer Dutt and Yogesh batted very attractively to add forty in jig time, whereupon both were expertly snaffled standing up by Finto, Yogesh for 35 off Nick Riches and Sameer for 16 off Pete Saville. Peter O'Donnell was joined by Kushrt (that's what's written in the book), and they added another untroubled forty runs.

Mr Kushrt is the worst runner between the wickets I have seen for a long time, making Shahid of Rush look expert and quick (neither of which he remotely is), but he can play some nice shots. From a free ball, he stroked Saville back over his head and Markey lumbered off in pursuit. George (as Peter is called to distinguish him from the other O'Donnell, Richie), called for two.

Kushrt reached the other end in about the time Usain Bolt would take for two hundred metres, turned away from Markey and slipped. Why he was wearing slicks, only he can tell us. George noticed the ball in Markey's hand and called 'No'. By the time Kushrt had picked himself up and started back the ball had hit the stumps, which is just as well for Malahide as the bowler had gone awol.

That was 95-5 and the beginning of the end. Ali was lbw, Singh hit the ball straight to extra cover and sold himself up the Swannee as George refused to budge, then Raza was superbly caught by Finto off Govan, George fell lbw to the Scottish off-spinner, and Richie made his customary blob. Del Boy showed why he is a specialist no. 10 with a characteristic 6*.

Belvo had been bowled out for 109 in 36.5 overs with every bowler tasting success. And some people wonder why I make jokes about them? They're engagingly and unpredictably useless, that's why. But Richie O'Donnell and Yogesh can bowl.

They rapidly had Malahide 16-3, two caught behind by one O'Donnell off the other, and Riches lbw to Yogesh. Jim Govan and Nick Turner blocked it out until tea and then slowly, very slowly, took the total up to fifty with Ernie Extras top-scoring. Turner then got the confidence to play some nice shots to raise his score above Ernie's.

Surprisingly on a slow turner of a pitch, neither Saadaf Raza's leggies nor Sameer Dutt's dodgy-looking offies made any impression, nor Yogesh's slowies. O'Donnell came back to have Turner caught behind for 35, leaving Johnny Pryor to see the Village home off 33.2 overs with Govan not out on 32, the same as Ernie.

Richie O'Donnell impressed with 3/26, and Yogesh with 1/22 and 35 showed that he, too, should be playing for a proper cricket club next season. With that win, Malahide are up in place of Pembroke. Pembroke's only competition next season will come from Rush. Belvo and CYM can revert to junior cricket, and Phoenix can play friendlies against the Gentlemen of Londonderry and Tyrone, if they can find any.

On Sunday I drove out to Inch to see part V of North County and Clontarf. As we got past Tallaght the rain got heavier, and although it eased off and the sky lifted as I reached Balrothery and I hung around for half an hour or so, it became obvious to me that it was going to be an eight points apiece jobbie, and we went home so the War Office could have the car for the afternoon. Nothing did happen.